The Way of Grace

I love when my world can be rocked by what I read and watch, when what is usually meant to kill time and numb the noodle actually produces good in me and sheds light on who I really am and what I need to change. Three things, working back to back, have changed my perspective so profoundly that I had to write about it, not so much for your benefit but for mine - so that I would never forget.

So, the first was, of course my recent trip to Spain. I was bathed in grace everywhere I went. I was given more than I deserved by my mother-in-law and everyone around me. The beauty I experienced truly impacted my heart. One sweet example that still leaves me with a little chuckle is when Kathy and I were walking on Christmas Eve to shop for dinner, and there was a little line of friendly folks holding up signs and smiling. We didn't know what they were doing, so we were about to pass them by. Out of curiosity we asked what this was about and they laughed and said, "Free Christmas Hugs!" We were so touched by this childlike display that we hugged them all and laughed as we went on our way. On so many levels I was swept away by grace in Spain- visually, humanly, materially and emotionally. It changed me.

Next, I read "Les Miserables" by Victor Hugo. Suddenly light and darkness, good and evil, eternal life, love and the human soul were larger than life. I walked with Jean ValJean as he experienced true grace - the kind that comes by example only and has the power to change lives. I saw him forgive, repay evil with good and ultimately, sacrifice himself, all in the name of love. On his death bed, Jean ValJean said, "Love each other well and always. There is nothing else but that in the world: love for each other." The beauty of his love in the midst of his misery inspires me and calls me higher.

The third life-changing event was a movie called, "The Tree of Life" with Brad Pitt and Sean Penn. These are the quotes that keep echoing in my mind:
"The nuns taught us there were two ways through life- the way of grace and the way of nature. You have to choose which one you'll follow."
"Grace doesn't try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries."
"Nature only wants to please itself, gets others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them, to have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy when all the world is shining around it. And love is smiling through all things."
"The nuns taught us that no one who loves the way of grace ever comes to a bad end."
"Help each other. Love everyone, every leaf, every ray of light. Forgive."

After all I had seen and been through, this movie forced me to ask myself which way I was taking through life - grace or nature? With tears I realized I was more of the latter. But the tears were good ones, the kind that produce change. I deeply desire to love and follow the way of grace.

Les Miserables taught me that misery, like a thread, is woven through our lives. Here in America especially we resent misery and feel entitled to the fairy tale that is sold us from birth. We shut ourselves off, we divorce eachother we withhold love because we want to rip that thread of misery from the fabric of our lives. What we don't realize is, that thread is delicately and bittersweetly entwined with the threads of compassion, true joy and deep love. It is only in accepting and embracing it that we become fully human and yet even transcend the human into reflecting the divine.

I am moved. I resolve to put love in the highest position. What else can we take from the earth with us to heaven? What greater legacy can we leave behind? I fear a life lived without loving to the full. I leave you with one last quote which I have been chewing on from the movie:

"The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by."

Spain Part 5

So, after about 30 hours and lost luggage, we are home - sigh. I am in love with Spain and could have stayed. When I left off last blog, we were in Algeciras, heading towards Gibraltar. Gibraltar proper is it's own little country so we were denied entry due to only having our passport cards with us. But we made the most of it and enjoyed the beach right outside of Gibraltar, under the enormous rock. It was quite a thrill to see it. So, my little toes had the privelege of touching the very tip of Spain where the Mediterranean meets the Atlantic. As Valencia is on the Mediterranean, we decided to drive up the coast on our route home.

My parents had been to Spain several years ago and mom told me to definitely check out Marbella, which we hit just in time for paella mariscos on the beach. It was a perfect day in a posh and very modern beach city. At twilight we reached Malaga, a large coastal city with beautiful architecture and interesting ruins. Joe and I only had about an hour there but it was worth it. Our next goal was to find a hotel on the beach for our last night of our adventure. We simply headed up the coast and landed at Salobrena just in time. There was a hotel on a high cliff overlooking the sea on three sides. It was surreal. Joe and I rang in the new year with some unforgettable time on our balcony: the moon above lighting the sea, lights from a small beach city in the distance, the sound of gentle waves below and a million stars over head. A perfect moment in time.

The next day our focus was on getting home, as our rental car was due back. It was fun to continue our coast drive and arrive in Cartagena just in time for lunch. Cartagena is a larger port city, built around the late 1800s. We had our small meal in a restaurant called La Patacha, which was an old boat docked in the sea. Dalton was thrilled. We reached Kathy's apartment just in time for the kids to drop dead asleep. It had been eventful, but worth every second. My eyes had seen radiant beauty at every turn and I am blown away not only by the landscape but by the people and the culture. The Spanish ENJOY life. They are happy and content and will rush to your side if you are in trouble or in need. They are generous in spirit. They take time to rest each day. The cities literally shut down from 2-4 pm each day. Families are close. It took me a few days to "mellow out" and just ENJOY. It was a little embarassing to see my own stress and impatience in light of their gentleness and joy.

On our last day in Valencia, we took some time to walk the city, pick up some keepsakes and have our last meal at an outdoor cafe. I ordered some "Valencian Paella" which was saffron rice with delicious seasonings and olive oil, veggies, chicken, rabbit and snails. It sounds terrible, but wow I loved it. Kathy took us and the boys to the circus in town, a real exciting treat for them and a grandmother's dream. We again had a perfect day.

I am grateful for our time in Spain. We had no choice but to fall in love with it. We had unforgettable family time. It was simply surreal and my mother in law is amazing for giving is such a gift, to see this breathtaking place. I do hope to see it again someday.

Happy New Year!!