The Way of Grace

I love when my world can be rocked by what I read and watch, when what is usually meant to kill time and numb the noodle actually produces good in me and sheds light on who I really am and what I need to change. Three things, working back to back, have changed my perspective so profoundly that I had to write about it, not so much for your benefit but for mine - so that I would never forget.

So, the first was, of course my recent trip to Spain. I was bathed in grace everywhere I went. I was given more than I deserved by my mother-in-law and everyone around me. The beauty I experienced truly impacted my heart. One sweet example that still leaves me with a little chuckle is when Kathy and I were walking on Christmas Eve to shop for dinner, and there was a little line of friendly folks holding up signs and smiling. We didn't know what they were doing, so we were about to pass them by. Out of curiosity we asked what this was about and they laughed and said, "Free Christmas Hugs!" We were so touched by this childlike display that we hugged them all and laughed as we went on our way. On so many levels I was swept away by grace in Spain- visually, humanly, materially and emotionally. It changed me.

Next, I read "Les Miserables" by Victor Hugo. Suddenly light and darkness, good and evil, eternal life, love and the human soul were larger than life. I walked with Jean ValJean as he experienced true grace - the kind that comes by example only and has the power to change lives. I saw him forgive, repay evil with good and ultimately, sacrifice himself, all in the name of love. On his death bed, Jean ValJean said, "Love each other well and always. There is nothing else but that in the world: love for each other." The beauty of his love in the midst of his misery inspires me and calls me higher.

The third life-changing event was a movie called, "The Tree of Life" with Brad Pitt and Sean Penn. These are the quotes that keep echoing in my mind:
"The nuns taught us there were two ways through life- the way of grace and the way of nature. You have to choose which one you'll follow."
"Grace doesn't try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries."
"Nature only wants to please itself, gets others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them, to have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy when all the world is shining around it. And love is smiling through all things."
"The nuns taught us that no one who loves the way of grace ever comes to a bad end."
"Help each other. Love everyone, every leaf, every ray of light. Forgive."

After all I had seen and been through, this movie forced me to ask myself which way I was taking through life - grace or nature? With tears I realized I was more of the latter. But the tears were good ones, the kind that produce change. I deeply desire to love and follow the way of grace.

Les Miserables taught me that misery, like a thread, is woven through our lives. Here in America especially we resent misery and feel entitled to the fairy tale that is sold us from birth. We shut ourselves off, we divorce eachother we withhold love because we want to rip that thread of misery from the fabric of our lives. What we don't realize is, that thread is delicately and bittersweetly entwined with the threads of compassion, true joy and deep love. It is only in accepting and embracing it that we become fully human and yet even transcend the human into reflecting the divine.

I am moved. I resolve to put love in the highest position. What else can we take from the earth with us to heaven? What greater legacy can we leave behind? I fear a life lived without loving to the full. I leave you with one last quote which I have been chewing on from the movie:

"The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by."

Spain Part 5

So, after about 30 hours and lost luggage, we are home - sigh. I am in love with Spain and could have stayed. When I left off last blog, we were in Algeciras, heading towards Gibraltar. Gibraltar proper is it's own little country so we were denied entry due to only having our passport cards with us. But we made the most of it and enjoyed the beach right outside of Gibraltar, under the enormous rock. It was quite a thrill to see it. So, my little toes had the privelege of touching the very tip of Spain where the Mediterranean meets the Atlantic. As Valencia is on the Mediterranean, we decided to drive up the coast on our route home.

My parents had been to Spain several years ago and mom told me to definitely check out Marbella, which we hit just in time for paella mariscos on the beach. It was a perfect day in a posh and very modern beach city. At twilight we reached Malaga, a large coastal city with beautiful architecture and interesting ruins. Joe and I only had about an hour there but it was worth it. Our next goal was to find a hotel on the beach for our last night of our adventure. We simply headed up the coast and landed at Salobrena just in time. There was a hotel on a high cliff overlooking the sea on three sides. It was surreal. Joe and I rang in the new year with some unforgettable time on our balcony: the moon above lighting the sea, lights from a small beach city in the distance, the sound of gentle waves below and a million stars over head. A perfect moment in time.

The next day our focus was on getting home, as our rental car was due back. It was fun to continue our coast drive and arrive in Cartagena just in time for lunch. Cartagena is a larger port city, built around the late 1800s. We had our small meal in a restaurant called La Patacha, which was an old boat docked in the sea. Dalton was thrilled. We reached Kathy's apartment just in time for the kids to drop dead asleep. It had been eventful, but worth every second. My eyes had seen radiant beauty at every turn and I am blown away not only by the landscape but by the people and the culture. The Spanish ENJOY life. They are happy and content and will rush to your side if you are in trouble or in need. They are generous in spirit. They take time to rest each day. The cities literally shut down from 2-4 pm each day. Families are close. It took me a few days to "mellow out" and just ENJOY. It was a little embarassing to see my own stress and impatience in light of their gentleness and joy.

On our last day in Valencia, we took some time to walk the city, pick up some keepsakes and have our last meal at an outdoor cafe. I ordered some "Valencian Paella" which was saffron rice with delicious seasonings and olive oil, veggies, chicken, rabbit and snails. It sounds terrible, but wow I loved it. Kathy took us and the boys to the circus in town, a real exciting treat for them and a grandmother's dream. We again had a perfect day.

I am grateful for our time in Spain. We had no choice but to fall in love with it. We had unforgettable family time. It was simply surreal and my mother in law is amazing for giving is such a gift, to see this breathtaking place. I do hope to see it again someday.

Happy New Year!!

Spain Part 4

We made it! I am writing this from a hotel called Alboran, in a city called Algeciras. We just finished dinner of atun, patatas, arroz cubana y helado. We are at the tip of southern Spain. I cannot adequately describe the beauty of what I have just seen, having driven 3 hours throught the mountains on our slow descent to the sea. The land is untouched and looks as if it must have for thousands of years. From the olive groves at the top to the orange groves at the bottom it was simply surreal. Unforgettable.

This modern hotel vastly different from where we have been for the last two days, a country paradise called Cinco Lunas, a bed and breakfast little inn that a man named Gonzalo built with his own two hands. It was impossible to find, but amazing when we did. Situated near the hill town of Zahara de la Sierra, in the hills of Andalusia, about 40 km from Ronda, it is an untouched feast for the eyes. The soul breathes a deep sigh. Gonzalo and Anja have two small children, Merlin and Marai, who were the ages of our children. The couple have sheep, chickens, olives, apricots, nuts, figs, oranges, all kinds of organic veggies and breads and cheese. They make their own olive oil. A stream runs through their little slice of Heaven where green hills snuggle them in. Everywhere you look nature beckons you to come and enjoy, eat drink and be merr.

Our kids, 3 and 1 have been absolute troopers, patiently enduring and even enjoying the worst of it, like our 13 hour car trip from Valencia. We left at 7AM and headed south west towards Cordoba. What an amazing little city. Ancient and beautiful, with cobblestone streets and the largest mosque in Spain, built in the 15th century. We then drove to Andalucia and got lost. But getting lost in Spain is a treat. You encounter charming small towns and farms and the sunset seems to last forever.

Today we head to Gibraltar. We forgot our passports at home, so we can't go to Morocco today, but at least I will be able to put my foot on the very tip of Spain.

Finally, I must give God the glory. At every perilous turn, every worry, every uncertainty, I felt his guidance and he kept us safe and answered our prayers. More to come. Today will certainly be another unforgettable time.

Spain Part 3

I sit here with an excitement, the kind you feel when you're off to an amazing and unexpected adventure. As all three of us, Joe, his mom and I are pretty spontaneous, this morning we decided to rent a car and drive 8 hours south to Sevilla, near Gibraltar and the tip of North Africa, Morocco. However, it took us several hours to procure a vehicle, which would have placed us in Sevilla sometime after midnight, which none of us were too excited about. So, tomorrow we are off!! Which means you must tune in to Spain Part 4.

But I hope this entry doesn't disappoint. Well, things just kept increasing in interest and beauty after I left off at the beach. I have to admit, the beach was so wonderful that I went back the next day all alone and took a very long walk and watched the sunset. A salty old dude decided to walk with me, a life-long Valencian. We got along just fine with bits of both our mother tongues as we walked along. He sang me a song in Spanish as if he were an old movie star and I was a beautiful senorita. It was wonderful. I felt perfectly safe, as he was gentle and very old.

One thing we knew we would do beforehand was to check out the Oceanographic, Valencia's amazing aquarium. We spent all day oohing and ahhing like children at the creatures, and we took in a fun dolphin and trainer show. We ate at a restaurant called The Submarine, which was fine dining as if you were inside the sea. The fish swam all around us in an infinity aquarium. It was breathtaking.

It was fun to celebrate Christmas Eve here in Valencia. Kathy and I walked to the beautiful Central Market where we bought an leg of lamb, mint, lemon thyme, salad, baked pumpkin (a treat here), fresh bread, lox, cream cheese, a special cream filled log cake, asparagus and mushrooms (the lox and cream cheese were for Christmas morning, something I have been eating on Christmas morning since I was little). It was a wonderful feast, having prepared the lamb seared and braised with rosemary, garlic, onions, carrots olive oil, broth and white wine. We dined with red wine and candles and ended the night with my personal Christmas Eve favorite, "It's a Wonderful Life" with Jimmy Stewart. For once the streets were quiet, as most were home with their families.

The next day my very ambitious mother-in-law planned a train ride to Segunt for a hike to an ancient castle in ruins, then a visit to the Bancaja Nativity, the largest in Europe. Segunt is like something out of a movie, with narrow cobblestone streets, whitewashed or bright row houses, colorful verandas with flowers, and ancient Roman ruins. It wore me out but I am so glad we saw it. The nativity was a miniature recreation of the whole story of Jesus' birth - Jerusalem, Bethlehem, Egypt, the Temple...wow.

I must admit I was refreshed to not be reminded so heavily of Christmas in a commercial way like I am in America. We had a rustic, romantic, warm time that will forever stand out in my memory as one of my favorites. Dalton was perfectly thrilled with a tiny Christmas sock (we didn't have stockings) with a couple of chocolates and a some candy and a small wooded drum. For us it was more about the experiences we were having and the joy of simply being together in Spain.

I truly hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!! More to come...

Spain Part 2

I know it's silly to say only after 3 1/2 days in a foreign country that you already have a favorite day, but this one will be hard to beat. If you know me, you know I am a "California girl", complete with an undeniable love affair with the beach. Well, we had the most wonderful afternoon at the Mediterranean seaside. Let me fill you in with all the details.

We woke up late, as Joe's mom informed us is the usual Spanish way, had a cafe con leche, a pastry and caught the Metro for a quick jaunt to the beach. It was sunny and in the low 60's, perfecto!! Dalton and Fielding immediately busied themselves with sand, rocks and water, filling each and every crevice of their bodies with sand, the finest and softest I had ever felt before. The sea was a deep blue and the waves were perfectly mellow, just the right setting for a peaceful prayer walk and some shell scouting.

Two of my other loves are pottery and antiques, so the next thing that happened truly delighted my soul. As I started to search for an unforgettable stone to bring home or some beach glass, instead I started to find ancient pottery shards. Oh my goodness, I was in heaven. I must have picked up a couple of pounds of the stuff, but it is beautiful and old and will always remind me of this perfect day.

After frolicking for a couple of hours, we took a nice walk along the sea and then stopped at a tapas restarant and had ensalada Valenciana, gambas fritas, papas fritas, hamburgesa, queso manchego and of course, cerveza. It was right on the beach too. AHHH my beach fix for now.

Yesterday was really special too, as Kathy's headmaster Sara had us over for a very special lunch complete with champagne, wine, and many special Spanish foods. She really spoiled us.

It's been heavenly so far...and if you're interested there is more to come. We love the culture of walking everywhere, taking it easy, enjoying eachother and savoring amazing foods. I feel like I am on a second honeymoon, Valencia is muy romantico!!

Spain 2011 Part 1

December 17

I am sitting on the bed in Kathy's (Joe's mom) apartment in Valencia, Spain. I am listening to the washing machine upstairs and the sounds of dinner cooking. The kids are peacefully napping. We will be up much later than normal, as that is the way in Espana, no? Today was our first full day. We woke up late, got ready and went out for hamon y queso bocadillas, cafe y orange juice, freshly squeezed from the Valecia oranges here. Wow, nothing better. We went to an amazing marketplace inside an ancient building complete with beautiful cielings and views. It was bustling and everywhere I looked there were amazing treats for my mouth and eyes. Cerano ham, fresh fruits, cheeses, nuts, fish...we will eat the fruits of our labor tonight..fresh salmon. It was fun to see everyone so relaxed, sitting and sipping cerveza or cafe and enjoying the beautiful sunny day. It must have been in the 60's, a truly perfect day.

I have been praying a lot for God's help and protection. Yesterday, our long travel day, was truly a lesson in relying on God. Before weo left on the 15th I got down on my knees and begged God to not only keep us and the plane safe but to bless every aspect of the trip, every layover, each connecting flight, everything. I know He was with us. The kids were amazing all day, even after 21 hours of travel. There was a play area in the Madrid airport that was a lifesaver. It had a huge sink and changing area, just in time to solve Dalton's "poopmergency". The lady who worked there just loved the kids and called them "dulces" or sweet. There was the sweetest lady named Cristina from Costa Rica on our last flight from Madrid to Valencia. We were bone tired and she was fascinated with the kids, which really helped this sleepy mama. After an over-priced taxi ride to Kathy's house, we took a minute to get settled and then went to dinner at Cuervas, a tapas restuarant down below. We had stuffed eggplant, fried brie with currant jelly, chicken croquets, shrimp skewers, baguettes and beer. It was heavenly. Our tuckered little ones fell right asleep. Fielding woke up a few times to talk and have more milk, but he awoke happy and ready for the day today.

Thanks so much, Lord, for blessing our trip already. It's been amazing so far...more to come!

Happy Green Year!

"We do not inhertit the planet from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children." ~Anonymous

I was recently inspired by someone in Hollywood. Her name is Alicia Silverstone and she starred in "Clueless" in the 90's. She, although not limited in monetary resources, decided to make some changes to be more responsible to the environment. She now buys everything she can second hand as well as eats organic foods, among other things. I love it! She does it out of love for the Earth and to give her children a gift: a healthier environment.

So, I decided to list a few of the things our family has been doing to be more environmentally responsible, just in time for the New Year.

1. We meet our household's needs mostly second-hand.
- Thrift stores are amazing for clothing, decorative items and even gifts.
- Craig's List has blown us away as far as what you can get for your money. Ridiculous prices for gently used furniture and appliances. Heck, I even got my maternity clothes from there!

2. We buy a share from a local farm.
- Flavorful, organic and seasonal veggies for a fraction of what you would pay at the store.
- Supports local farms.
- Teaches our children the value of foods and how to eat in a healthy way.
- Keeps me on my toes in the kitchen and helps me learn how to cook all kinds of veggies.

3. We grow our own foods.
- It's been so fun for our family to grow, tend and eat from a garden.
- Great, timeless lessons for our sons and super, healthy food. You can taste the sunshine!

4. Barter or trade with neighbors and friends.
- We paid nothing for our "latest" (not new) vehicle because a friend needed ours and we
needed his. We just traded!

5. Obvious, ok, but RECYCLE!!
- So much more can be recycled than we know.

6. Buy organic.
- We consume so many toxins and pesticides than aren't found in or on organic foods.

7. Which leads me to my next one: cut down on the box, bag or can.
- I find it almost impossible to do away with certain prepackaged goods, but KNOWING what
goes into our meals at home gives me great peace of mind.
- Less packaging to end up in the landfill.
- Less chemicals to end up in our bodies and brains.
- Whole food cooking and eating is just good for our general health, helping us to fight off
diseases and turn back the clock.

8. Wear layers at home.
- We really don't need to overheat our homes if we layer even inside.
- Saves on energy and cuts down on those beloved bills.

9. Use what you have.
- Often I find what I need right at home if I look hard enough.
- Become need driven instead of want driven.

10. Donate what you aren't using.
- Your local Goodwill or ARC will thank you for helping their cause with your wonderful, gently
used items that no longer fit, are needed or go with your decor.

It really feels good to live this way. I know it's not for everyone, but it's amazing how much money we have saved and how good we feel about these changes. Next stop: COMPOSTING!! I'm just not there yet...

Happy Green Year!
What have you done to GO GREEN? I would love to know...